Well, T minus 3 days to the first of the wedding weekend extravaganza events, the rehearsal, the rehearsal dinner, and the post-rehearsal dinner afterparty, latter of which I will definitely be skipping. I got the hangers for the table runners today at WalMart, non-slip extra large guys so that hopefully, they will arrive not too wrinkled. I stopped there after my noon women's meeting mostly because of serious dearth of Milkbones here in the little yellow house, which winds up making everyone unhappy, then thought of napkins for the breakfast and snack items I am taking for the little houseful of women who will be dressing, getting hair and makeup done, and generally yucking it up with the bride before the ceremony. Very excited about that part of the weekend, watching my lovely and accomplished daughter don her designer gown and step out to begin her life as a married woman. Strangely, though she is 31 years old, an attorney, and definitely a grown-up, she will always be my little redheaded sweetpot, the one who cried when the seagull stole her hotdog at the San Francisco Zoo, the one who would lay with her head in my lap and watch videos, drink hot chocolate, and eat Orville Reddenbacher's caramel corn on our Saturday nights together. Motherhood is a mixed blessing, for sure. I miss both my kids, my son and my daughter, every day. Not the people they are now, though they are sure precious and wonderful, but my 4 year old son, so sweet and trusting and brave, and my 11 year old daughter, so curious and eloquent with her words and deeds. That will be true all our lives together, I guess. And I do want to believe that the best is yet to come. Certainly our lives together, my children and I, have been full of all kinds of wonderful as well as awful stuff, and isn't that the way of the world, anyway? Who can hurt you more than those you love so very much? Why would I be hurt if the clerk at Safeway told me she hated me? Who cares about the clerk at Safeway? But when my baby girl said that, wow, pierced me to the core. Even though I knew she didn't mean it, not forever, anyway. A long time ago, I made a promise that I would always leave my kids with love, in case I may never see them again, and they could remember me with kindness. That has not always been easy. So, taking my sweetest, kindest, most loving self to the wedding, to be auxiliary person, just the Mother of the Bride. It is Sweetpot's day, she and her lovely man. Pictures to follow, for sure.
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